How Did I Make It Here? — White Flag Verses

A reflection on clearer skies, the road behind us, and the work of becoming a better version of ourselves.

How did I make it here? it's like the gloomy skies are gone, all i see is a sky so clear riding without musketeers seers of the truth we ain't tryna damage the youth , just waiting for the day that i could shoot some basketball while improving myself as a man to lay something down in the booth The fruit of my labor is the peace on my mind whenever I dream I try not to go blind So I could see the version I wanna be and figure out how to align I miss my mother yet I had no brother so I'm still working through resentments on how she likes to smother It feels superficial now that I'm gone but sometimes I wonder How it would've been having someone to talk to all those depressing summers While I was taking out the trash to the dumpsters, The priveleged kids used to travel with their lovers My dad would be on top of me for school work every year He believed I could be somebody even when I couldn't see it clear He attended all my basketball games and even trained with me that's why I couldn't wrap my head around it when my mom treated him shitty I still don't, but at least he told me to go to meetings with him At age 15 I got clean for the first time and ran a 5 minute mile Got a scholarship and got away from public education for a while I'm still sad my mom couldn't get that citizenship She Stayed in the marriage but if she could've she would've divorced him I'm glad she stayed though even though she never saw me play It served as a reflection for the dynamics I live today Some like to hover over me but to my truest sentiments never give the time of day and others can see the dishonesty so just sit back and pray I used to feel lonely until I got set free from self pity it was like cutting broken wires out from my anatomy last night was a bad one I mentally relapsed into thinking a pornstar and I could be I'm delusional when I get no sleep, thinking those who pass by actually care but in the end my emotions only hurt me.